


Nothing Was Ever Easy

by 35000percentdone



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 9.06 Coda, Dean isn't a dick, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, almost a date night, he's actually sweet, schmoopy stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-05
Updated: 2014-06-05
Packaged: 2018-02-03 11:58:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1743899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/35000percentdone/pseuds/35000percentdone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in the"fanfiction gap" in 9.06, Dean and Cas hang out. Dean drops the act and is himself, Cas starts some stuff. And so it goes...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nothing Was Ever Easy

**Author's Note:**

> This one took me FOREVER to finish (obviously)... I hope you all like it!

"Dinner?" Dean asked "burgers and some delicious pie?"

Cas looked at Dean, expression confused. He couldn't figure why Dean was here, wanting to hunt with him, and now wanting to eat with him. If Cas was such a danger, why was Dean here? Cas could ask himself that question, he could even ask Dean, but it wasn't like he'd get a decent answer. And the plain truth was that he missed Dean, missed spending time with him, hated that he'd had to leave the bunker.

"Ok. But remember I have my date tonight."

"Oh yeah, I'll get you there in time." Dean's voice dropped a little lower, "don't want you to miss that." 

Dean felt the bitterness in his voice and chastised himself for it. You kicked him out, he told himself, you have no fucking right. He's a guy, you're a guy, get the fuck over it. Just cause that one time...

No. Don't be a pathetic bitch. That one time meant nothing. This is Cas, he's a human now, things have changed. Just fucking drop it.

Cas looked at Dean funny, but there was no way he could know what battle was going on behind his freckled forehead. Cas had the same memory as Dean did, but he didn't pretend it meant anything now. Besides, Dean was very straight, a manly man, a moment of weakness meant nothing. 

*******************

Dinner started off tense, but Cas couldn't help but be swayed by Dean. Dean had always been his rock, his righteous man leading him, the most important person in his long life. He didn't want to push Dean away, even though he was angry. 

Talk became easier, and Dean asked about his life now, not bringing up anything that happened before. Cas spoke freely, telling him about the gas station, his customers, the new things he'd learned. Cas's pride in learning humanity was contagious, and Dean smiled easily at Cas's stories. 

By the time they got to pie, Dean and Cas were laughing together, their tentative new bond knitting them back together. Dean felt a weight had been lifted, he didn't need to worry about Cas as a human, he was doing it, actually doing it, and doing well. 

As the pie turned into nothing but buttery crumbs, Dean started feeling tension again. Cas was good, he was fine, but Dean... he didn't know what he felt. He didn't do the whole feelings bullshit, that was for girls, but he couldn't help it. Cas didn't need them anymore, didn't need him. Dean would never admit how much that hurt, but he hid his sadness behind his smile, as he always did.

"Whoa, check out the time! We gotta get you to the ball!" Dean exclaimed, forcing more enthusiasm than he truly felt. 

Cas squinted, "what ball? I'm supposed to be at Nora's. I don't believe we are going to a ball, however. Typically those are held..."

"No, just a, figure of speech. You'll, nevermind, you'll get there". Dean dropped a few bills on the table, waving away Cas's attempts to contribute, then clapped a hand in his shoulder. Dean could tell himself whatever he wanted, but it didn’t mean the fondness in his eyes didn’t exist, nor did it mean that the shock of warmth that raced down his spine as he touched Cas didn’t exist either. 

*********************

Watching Cas go to the house for his date was more difficult than Dean expected. It shouldn't be fucking difficult at all, it's good the guy is getting some action! He's a good looking guy, if you liked that type... dammit, Winchester, no thinking about that! Dean fisted his eyes as he sat at the red light, hoping he could crush his thoughts of Cas that easily. And worse, he knew the advice he'd given to Cas was shit, hadn’t really been ready for him to truly succeed with Nora. He didn’t want to think too much about why. The hot liquid pool that his gut became watching Cas take off his vest and unbutton his shirt had thrown him off. Cas’s eyes, so wide and trusting, had affected him. His look was not unlike the look he’d had at the den of iniquity, that fear that trapped him and negated his chances, but it wasn’t it, not fully. Dean had also seen hope in Cas’s eyes, maybe even lust? Dean shook his head, trying to think of anything other than Cas’s elegant fingers, nimbly undoing the buttons on his shirt. Cas’s shoulders straining forward, shrugging the vest off and tossing it in the back. The hollows of Cas’s throat and collarbones thrown into stark relief as he looked between Dean and Nora’s tidy little home. 

Fuck.

******************

Cas was disappointed that Nora turned out to just want him to babysit, but not overly so. He thought of dinner with Dean, the warmth of his eyes as they shared a meal. He didn’t understand what was so complicated with Dean. Cas knew that he felt strongly about Dean, that Dean was the reason Cas had done all he had. He thought about that one night, well, more like few minutes, with Dean. Walls down, he had gone to Dean, and Dean had turned to him, and… Baby Tanya’s cries stirred him from his trip down memory lane. 

********************

Once the drama had calmed, Cas found himself alone with Dean again. Dean was asking him where to for the night, and Cas didn't want to tell him the truth - that he slept in the storage room of the gas station, that his home consisted of a sleeping bag and some boxes. He felt shame, an emotion he was all too familiar with, both as an angel and as a human. But he found the strength to look Dean in the eyes and say it.

Dean laughed at first, sure there was no friggin way his angel was homeless and squatting in some squalid back room. No fucking way. "Cas, buddy, I can't bring you back there tonight, it's not happening." Cas started to interrupt, but Dean kept going, "look, I got a motel room for the night, you're coming with me. Besides, I gotta make sure that hand of yours is ok." Dean shook his head against any further arguments and waved Cas to get into the car. The thought of a real bed and a nice shower was too hard for him to deny.

Dean had grumbled something about needing supplies, and they stopped by one of those 24 hour pharmacy stores, the ones with a mish mash of crap always on sale under flickering neon lights. Dean and Cas walked in, Dean heading directly for antiseptics and bandages. Cas lingered in the promotional section, looking at silly pencil toppers and bagged candy. He was still there when Dean brushed against him, arms loaded down. 

"You ready to go?" Dean asked, nodding towards the registers, "you want something?"

"I can get things myself, Dean", Cas said in an irritated way, "I do work". 

"I know, I know, pretend I never asked, mm k? Let's head out". Dean moved quickly to the front counter, shielding his purchases from Cas. Cas stood oblivious, instead considering a lump of caramel and pecans in a display. He grabbed one, and put it with Dean's pile. Dean smiled crookedly at him, flicking his glance between Cas's mouth and deep blue eyes. He blinked a few times, then focused back on the transaction at hand. He grabbed their bags and headed out. 

The motel was shabby as always, kitschy and dated. Cas had been in dozens of hotel rooms with Dean, but never had he felt so awkward before. Dean dropped his bags on the closest bed and started rummaging through them. Cas stood quiet for a moment, watching Dean, then said "I'd like to take a shower."

Dean looked up and nodded, "yeah, man, alright. Uh, wait, I got you something." Dean rifled through the bags again until he found what he'd been looking for - a pajama set.  
Cas furrowed his brows at Dean, tilting his head to the side. Before he could ask, Dean supplied "I figured you should have something comfortable to sleep in. And there's a laundry, uh, thing, here, we can wash your clothes." His tone was sheepish, and Cas gave him a small smile. "Thank you, Dean. That is...very thoughtful".  
"Yeah, well..." Dean didn't look at him, but held the pajamas out to him. "If you want to toss your clothes out, I'll wash them. Have to do some of mine anyways. I'll patch your hand up when you get out of the shower." The usual gruffness was in Dean's voice, but none of the usual anger or frustration. This was a softer version, and Cas liked it. "Ok", Cas said, taking the pajamas and shutting himself in the bathroom. 

A few minutes later, the bathroom door opened, and Cas called for Dean. He handed him a stack of clothes, not missing how Dean's eyes flicked down the slice of Cas showing in the doorway, then Dean turned and moved away.

The shower was amazing. Cas didn't often get a chance to take an actual shower - usually it was a wet rag in the gas station bathroom sink - and he took his time. The water sluicing over his skin felt incredible, and he scrubbed his skin hard with the rough washcloth, trying to wash away the memories of the night. He instead forced himself to think of something else, and found himself thinking of that one time with Dean.

It had been after fighting Famine, when Sam had been locked away in Bobby's panic room, detoxing from demon blood. Dean had been listening to his brother, drinking heavily, then had escaped upstairs, into the junkyard. Cas had followed a moment later, unwilling to let Dean out of his sight in case he did something stupid.  
He'd found Dean standing by a few junked out cars, whiskey bottle fallen to his side. Dean was whispering "please", his voice hitching with tears. Cas had walked up behind him, putting a hand on his shoulder. Dean had started, but then turned around to look Cas in the eyes. He'd had no words then, and instead had pulled Cas into a tight hug. Cas could feel Dean's chest hitching, fighting back tears, could feel his face, hot and working against his shoulder.

They had started like that for a few minutes, until Dean finally pulled back. His eyes were red and swollen, lips, too, and Cas could see how hard Dean was trying to hold it together. Cas had lifted a hand and placed it on Dean's cheek, trying to make Dean feel better, saying how Sam was strong, he would get rid of the demon blood, everything would be ok... until Dean had placed his hand over Cas's. It was Cas's turn to stop, and his breath hitched. They looked at each other for an intense moment, eyes searching each other's, then they crashed together like waves on a lonely beach.

Dean had pulled Cas to him, lips hot and dry on his own, tongue plunging into Cas's mouth. Cas didn't know quite how to react, but he followed Dean's lead, trying to kiss back as best he could. The kiss was searing through him, making him feel things he was not accustomed to. Dean had his hands tight around Cas's back, lean body pressed fully against him, and he started walking them back until he had Cas against one of the cars. 

Cas find himself unable to think, as his body was reacting without his input. His hands were grabbing at Dean, scratching through Dean's hair, rubbing the quivering muscles of his body. Dean was pressing himself against Cas, grinding, as he broke their kiss and instead went to work on Cas's neck. Those full lips of Dean's, sucking, kissing, biting along his neck had made Cas unable to control his reactions. He was making noises, whimpers and groans, breathing hard. His body began to react as well, and he subconsciously arched his hips against Dean. 

Dean froze. He pulled back, eyes wide, fixed on Cas's. It might have been fear, disgust, lust, surprise, maybe a mixture of all, but Dean shut down. 

"I'm sorry, Cas, I... I can't. Fuck." Dean says this brokenly, backing up, and started back to the house.

Cas watched him go, shoulders hunched, then had fluttered away.

Cas was smiling a bit at the memory, a sad smile. He had known then that he was attracted to Dean, and he was still. He didn't understand the importance humanity placed on gender and sex and love... those were three separate things, why should they be limited? None was more right than the other in God's eyes. 

Coming back fully into the present, Cas found that his body had reacted to the memory as well, as his cock had begun to stiffen between his legs. He washed it leisurely, enjoying the feel of his hands slipping over the flushed head, pulling at the length of him. Cas sighed, then shook his head. Not a good time.

By the time he had rinsed off and put on his new pajamas, he had relaxed. When he walked out of the bathroom, Dean was laying on one of the beds, a bottle of beer in one hand. He did a double take at Cas, who was wearing his new pajamas. The shirt was a light blue, and the color offset his eyes beautifully, making them look even more saturated with color. The pants were a light gray and blue plaid, and as Dean's eyes crept down Cas's body, he noticed painfully that Cas wasn't wearing underwear, as he could damn near see the outline of Cas's dick. 

"H, h, hey Cas" Dean said as he nodded his head at him, gathering himself again. "I should take a look at that hand. Um, here, have a seat. On the bed." A blush was riding up on Dean's cheeks, as he got up quickly and went to the other bed, digging through the bags. Cas sat obediently where Dean gestured, watching as he moved across the room. Supplies in hand, Dean grabbed one of the small kitchenette chairs and dragged to a spot in front of bed where Cas was sitting. 

Dean was edged close to the bed, knees on either side of Cas's. They were incredibly close, and Cas gulped, feeling the heat radiate from Dean's body. Dean was tending to his hand with the lightest touch, being more gentle than he had ever been with him. He cleaned out the wound, then medicated and bandaged it. Dean then started gently manipulating his wrist, "let me know if it hurts", and Cas had nodded in assent. 

There were some sore spots, so Dean wrapped his wrist up tight, helping it stay stable. As he was finishing up, he looked up at Cas for the first time, and he let out a deep breath. His hands still holding Cas's, his lips quirked slightly, but couldn't look away. Cas smiled back and said "thank you, Dean", but neither of them moved from their position. 

The moment held on, until Cas decided to make the first move, emboldened by the memory of that night in the junkyard. His lips met Dean's hesitantly, leaving his lips still after the kiss had ended, breathe light on Dean's mouth. Dean had closed his eyes but reopened them, looking at Cas before moving forward and kissing him back. The kisses were gentle, experimental and sweet. Still clasping Cas's hand in one of his, Dean brought his other hand to Cas's face, thumb sliding over his cheekbone, then moving further back to grip on his still wet hair.

Their kisses became deeper, tongues tangling, becoming more insistent. Cas could feel himself becoming aroused again, wondering with a distant part of his mind if Dean was, too. Cas scooted a bit closer, his good hand reaching around Dean's side. Dean's back was well muscled and taut, skin thrumming under the thin fabric of his shirt. Cas's other hand lay on Dean's thigh, and he could feel Dean widen his legs to scoot closer, too.

"Cas", Dean murmured, breaking their kiss, pulling back to look at Cas, really look at him, eyes searching his face. Cas looked open, vulnerable, blue eyes almost black. Cas's lips were red, damp and swollen, all together looking destroyed but beautiful. Dean gulped, unsure of what to do next. He wanted Cas, had wanted Cas for years, but had never allowed himself to fully give in to his feelings. He thought of the night in the junkyard, how erotic their kiss had been, his terrified he'd become when he felt Cas's arousal. He was sick of running from this, sick to death of denying himself. Dean Winchester was scared of nothing, why the fuck should he be scared of this?

"Do you... I mean, are you..." Dean trailed off, unsure of what he was really asking. Thankfully, Cas got the gist. "Yes. Yes, Dean. I want this. I want... you. I have always been, for you."

Dean squeezed his eyes shut, Cas's words tumbling through him, bouncing over and breaking down the walls he'd spent so long constructing. When he opened his eyes again, Cas was staring at him in his normal way, and Dean's heart ached at the familiarity of it. He leaned in, tipping his head, lining his lips up with Cas's, and sinking into the kiss. Dean's hands ran over his shoulders, down over his chest and stomach, coming to the hem of his shirt. He let his hands slide under, feeling the warmth of Cas's skin under his fingertips. Cas's breath hitched, and he let out a soft moan. Dean couldn't hold himself back any longer, so he gripped the shirt and pulled it over Cas's head. His came next, desperate to feel and be felt with nothing else between them, no further distractions. 

Cas had seen Dean shirtless before, naked before, truthfully, but never like this, never for him. Dean's chest was well muscled, the anti-possession tattoo dark against his smooth skin. But he only had a moment to look as Dean was pressed up against him, skin to skin.

And it was intoxicating. 

Dean's skin was hot against his, and Cas could feel his heart working double time. Their kissing became more frantic, as though they couldn't get enough of each other, like they didn't have all night. Cas's wounded hand lay off to the side, out of harms way, but his other roamed the tight curves and edges of Dean's chest, back, ending up on his hips. Dean groaned as he pushed his hips forward involuntarily, wanting Cas's touch, wanting his hand to find the throbbing erection imprisoned in his jeans.

Dean stood up halfway, still kissing Cas, and began nudging him back further on the bed. Cas figured out what he was doing and helped get back further, finally laying sideways on the bed underneath Dean. He was hard, so much harder than he could remember being before, and the friction of the pajama pants wasn't helping.

With Cas now supine, Dean stretched his body on top of his, knees alternating, hips moving in slow circles. Cas gasped as their groins rubbed together, then let out a low moan. 

"Fuck, Cas..." Dean's voice was low and breathy, huffing warm puffs of air against his neck as he spoke, "you sound so damn hot." Every few words was punctuated with a nip on the neck, and Cas couldn't help but groan each time. He responded by moving his uninjured hand to the front of Dean's jeans, cupping and squeezing.  
It was Dean's turn to let out a loud groan, words unintelligible. He muttered something under his breath that sounded like "fuck this" as he moved one hand to undo his jeans, Cas's fumbling hands not much help. Between the two of them, they got his fly opened, and Dean reached into his tight boxer briefs with a grunt to pull his thick cock out. As it slid into Cas's hand, they both gasped, the feeling better than either of them expected. 

Cas wasn't really experienced with this, but his short strokes and tight grip had Dean panting almost immediately. He pressed his body down onto Cas, their dicks lined up next to each other, and they both stilled at the sensation. Dean had a quick moment of "holy shit, what the hell am I doing" before he realized, dammit, he wanted this. No bullshit, no trying to hide from himself, he wanted this. He wanted Cas. 

"Hold on" Dean rushed, sitting back on his calves then scooting off the end of the bed. Cas made a sound of dismay and pushed up on his elbows, which Dean countered with a grin, hooking his hands in his pants and pulling them down. Kicking them off, he leaned over the bed, running his hands up Cas's legs. He watched Cas's cock jump at the touch and licked his lips without even thinking. He tugged down his pants, finally exposing Cas's cock, and damn, even he had to admit it was beautiful. Dean knew that he had a good dick - enough ladies had praised him on it - but it was more because of size and thickness. Cas's was just... perfect, like an artist's rendering. Cleanly cut like the good Midwestern boy Jimmy had been, but smooth and almost ethereal in appearance. 

Cas was watching Dean with interest, as he had never put much thought into his body or appearance, and to be looked at like Dean was felt good. It felt even better when Dean leaned down and kissed the underside of the head of his cock. He jumped and gasped, not expecting the flood of sensation. Dean continued, licking and kissing his dick, and Cas couldn't help but writhe and moan in response.

Which turned Dean on like crazy. He'd always been a giving lover, and now was no exception. He thought of what felt good when done to him and tried to mimic it. His tongue slid up and down the sides of Cas's dick, flicking at the ridge of his head. He tried to deepthroat him and found that although he couldn't get all the way down, the way Cas's eyes had flown open and gazed at him, burning blue, was worth it. He sucked Cas's head between his lips, swirling his tongue, tasting the salty-sweet tang of precum. Cas keened and gripped at the sheets as he felt his belly begin to tighten, waves of arousal flowing through him.

"Dean" Cas growled, to which Dean responded with a bit tighter suction. He released Cas's dick, then crawled up so he was face to face with Cas again. Cas grabbed Dean needily, hungrily, mashing their lips together. He was still reeling from Dean's attention, and found that they were both moving in sync then, grinding and rubbing against each other. 

Dean realized then what was about to happen, but gave in to the sensation before he could chide himself on it. Dean had never cum before just from some fooling around, and here he was, balls tightening, ready to spill, from just rubbing against Cas. He began to grunt, hips moving jerkily now, cock slick next to Cas's, both their precum mixing together. Dean came with a cry, mouth buried in Cas's neck, his orgasm strong, pulse after pulse leaving him, muscles twitchy. 

Cas held on to Dean tightly through cumming, loving every sound, every motion, every part of Dean's orgasm. It was incredible - he'd watched humanity for millennia, including much sex, but had never experienced something like this. Then he came back to himself, and realized that his body was aching for the same release. Dean was still breathing into his shoulder, but began kissing up his neck, moving back to his lips. He snaked a hand in between them, gripping Cas's cock and beginning to stroke. 

It was like fireworks bursting in the sky, a thousand at once. It was like a winning cheer at a packed stadium, it was an orchestra's crescendo. It made his senses ring like they never had before and he felt the release in all parts of his body, even squeezing a tear from his eye. 

Dean just thought he looked awesome. He had kissed Cas until he had arched away, groaning Dean's name, every muscle tight and quivering. His black hair was all twists and spikes, a sheen of sweat covering him. His lips were dark pink, a perfect O, swollen from kissing. His cock had throbbed in Dean's hand, shooting jets of cum across both their chests and stomachs. His good hand dug into Dean's back, the other pressed to the mattress.  
They collapsed together, breathing deeply, foreheads touching. 

"Fuck, Cas... that, that was... damn", Dean couldn't even get a coherent thought out, and from the looks of it, Cas wasn't much better. He looked totally blown away, eyes fighting rolling back in his head as the aftershocks racked his body.

Cas looked at Dean, smile easing its way onto his lips. "Thank you, Dean".

"Oh fuck, Cas, you don't thank someone after, um, you know, after..." at this Dean waved his hand in the general direction of their bodies. "Ah fuck it", Dean smiled, kissing Cas gently, "thank you".

*******************

The next morning was hard, as saying goodbye always was. Dean hoped that Cas could get out, enjoy his human life now, be normal and forget all about this fucked up hunter he'd fallen for. 

But that didn't stop the sad, longing look they shared as Cas got out of the Impala and went to work.

Nothing was ever easy.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked it, please let me know! I love feedback!


End file.
